During the course of our trip we've been exposed to multiple examples of bribe and police corruption, in Russia, Ukraine, and Kazahkstan, to date.
I feel that Kazahkstan has a long way to go, in terms of tactics and methodology to reach the level of success that Russian police have attained. It's important to note that the Russians have had a stronger infrastructure for much longer and it's really a testament to their engineering efforts to allow their police force to fleece motorists much more efficiently and effectively.
In Russia we were passing a huge monument to Soviet dominance (?) when I drifted into the passing lane to allow for a better shot for Cloud to snap. In their usual manner, the cops had lined both lanes of traffic with wand-wielding officers pulling over potential marks one after another. We almost always got pulled over in Russia when we were spotted, mainly because we look foreign. This time was no different.
The officer quickly pulled me over, waved me out of the car, asked for my papers, my passport, my license, the car insurance, the car this and that, and each request, I would shrug my shoulders as if I didn't understand what he was saying. This is pretty normal. The less you understand, the more frustrated they get, the more time they waste on you the less time they can spend on people who will simply hand over cash.
He took me into the roadside office, and sat me down at his terminal. He asked me if I wanted jail jail jail? I responded with smiles and shoulder pats and showed them my empty wallet. He didn't like that and got a few other guys in the room and they found some wormy little tech to get on the computer.
He smiled smugly and brought up Babelfish, and nodded at me knowingly, pointing at the screen. He typed in 500 euro fine ride center lane no seatbelt bad license.
He pointed and asked me if I understood. I convinced him that I got into the center lane because his partner waved me to the lane. He got instantly frustrated and called that cop in, who from what I could tell, said that it was probably true.
I laughed and said Ok bye? He got pretty upset and sat me back down and took my license and did scissors motion with his hands and put it into a cabinent and locked it. Then he pointed to the screen, as if the 500 euro would make all this go away.
I just shrugged and smiled.
He then got out a pad of tickets and said
"Protocol understand? Protocol!!!"
I said, "Ticket? Ok ticket! protocol! and got my pen out."
He then kept on and got his boss who came in stammering and yelling, I said that I had no money that the 'Soldats at the border took every penny'.
They laughed about that...and showed no sympathy. I then offered cigarettes and american whiskey. They quickly nodded and waved me back to the car, 45 minutes having elapsed.
I grabbed 4 of our bribe packs, Marlboro, American, and a bottle of Hungarian dessert wine, Tokaj. Hardly whiskey and worth 3-4 dollars.
I went back to the station and the chief there invited me for a drink, and I said NO NO expensive, Russian Vodka? They all liked this, and we had a shot each. It was pretty surreal, doing vodka shots with Russian cops in their office mid-day.
I wanted to get out quickly, before they opened teh bottle and realized it wasn't American, wasn't expensive, and certainly wasn't whiskey.
We drove on.
In Kazahstan, police bribery isn't all that common, to be honest...but there are pockets where money has rushed into areas and made corruption a bit more common. The worst area we've found, really the only bad one so far, was in Quislorda (sp?) an oil-rich city in the south central of the country. We got pulled over 5 times total in less than 2 hours on the road.
On our way out, we got pulled over by the two biggest hillbilly cops imaginable. One tall and lanky, with a mouth of gold teeth, the other fat and stout with a toothpick dangling from his mouth and a holster on his side. A careful glance showed it was empty.
Steven and I quickly popped out of the car and shook hands fast, and said hello, and were as friendly as possible. It's the best tactic, and getting into their faces fast usually confuses them and takes away their intimidation edge.
These two were really struggling to find something wrong. They spent a lot of time looking at the class of our licenses and Goldie tried to tell us that Cloud's E license was invalid since in Kazahkstan a B license is required to drive a car. His screwup was that the E class was actually a class that allowed you to drive anything! So even if it didn't match, it still allowed him to drive whatever he wanted on the roads. Nice try Goldie. I showed him mine, and said that my C class was the same as a B and that it was just different. He tried to push on his fat parner to keep that train of thought going but Stout Kazahk was smart enough to know it was a dead end.
They went around and tried to say that our Mongol Rally stickers were peeling and that was a violation. I shrugged and acted ignorant of his pleas, and he got bored.
Stout Kazahk then went into our car and looked around, while Goldie pantomimed me performing sexual acts with Kazahk women in the middle of the road. It was surreal. He wanted to know how many of the local girls I'd had my way with. I kept saying I was married and pointed to my ring. He pointed to his teeth and said "NO marry too baby".
Yeah that's probably why you aren't married, Goldie.
Eventually they had both poked into the car and in our carelessness we'd left in plain sight a pile of money from the last shakedown (we pulled cash to hide it so we could turn our pockets inside out for cops), a bottle of Johnny Walker (bribe whiskey) and a carton of cigarettes...all laying there for the taking.
They talked it over and then Stout Kazahk's cell phone rang and they jabbered a bit and he ran back to the car to answer it. He pointed to us and said GO America! Go bye. We waved and saluted and got ready to get back on the road.
Goldie took one step back, one last ditch effort to get some of our loot, and Cloud stepped between him. He was on a ridge so with his scary beard and a newfound height advantage, it took the wind out of the poor cop's sail.
We honked and said Love Kazahkstan!! and waved to our new friends. They said Love USA!! and waved back and gave us a hearty police siren counter-salute, and drove up the road to set up their next location to stage out of.
We drove on, with mixed emotions. It was nice to walk away unmolested, but we couldn't help but feel a bit bad for the two of them, and their inexperience and ineptitude with fleecing foreign motorists. I think with time they'll get better, if they are given the chance to grow and excel.
Steven and I are off to the Russian border now. Updates will be sparse.
Saturday, August 2, 2008
The Road to Almatay is paved with Salutes, Mutton, and Cigarettes
I can't begin to explain what an amazing and complex week this has been.
The Mongol Rally lived up to all my expectations this past week, delivering stress, adventure, challenges, comraderie, and hurdles to overcome.
We left Kiev with a sense of purpose, a vision that we'd be crossing kazahkstan in 2 days, and we accomplished just that. We woke up in a sunflower field three hours from the Russian border, and it was simply amazing. The Ukraine has miles and miles of nothing but sunflower fields. In the morning when the sun rises, and the evening when it sets, it's one of the most beautiful things imaginable.
We hit the Russian border and got shook down for about 500 bucks of Bryan's money, and Cloud stepped up and fought for most of it back with a Russian cop who had the idea he'd ran into a couple of rubes. We did our russian stint in 24 hours, sleeping in our car when we'd ran out of energy after meeting two English chaps, who had (like us) no contact with any ralliers in a day or so.
We encountered corrupt cop after corrupt cop, trying to get to Kazahkstan as quickly as possible, and met a few of the Spanish starting teams along the way. It was brilliant.
Eventually, Kazahkstan....(i'm running out of time and the internet lady is waving a pair of scissors at me, so I must flee).
Tomorrow the Kazahk border and beyond.
- Justin
The Mongol Rally lived up to all my expectations this past week, delivering stress, adventure, challenges, comraderie, and hurdles to overcome.
We left Kiev with a sense of purpose, a vision that we'd be crossing kazahkstan in 2 days, and we accomplished just that. We woke up in a sunflower field three hours from the Russian border, and it was simply amazing. The Ukraine has miles and miles of nothing but sunflower fields. In the morning when the sun rises, and the evening when it sets, it's one of the most beautiful things imaginable.
We hit the Russian border and got shook down for about 500 bucks of Bryan's money, and Cloud stepped up and fought for most of it back with a Russian cop who had the idea he'd ran into a couple of rubes. We did our russian stint in 24 hours, sleeping in our car when we'd ran out of energy after meeting two English chaps, who had (like us) no contact with any ralliers in a day or so.
We encountered corrupt cop after corrupt cop, trying to get to Kazahkstan as quickly as possible, and met a few of the Spanish starting teams along the way. It was brilliant.
Eventually, Kazahkstan....(i'm running out of time and the internet lady is waving a pair of scissors at me, so I must flee).
Tomorrow the Kazahk border and beyond.
- Justin
Almaty, Kazakhstan
Due to time constraints, we had to skip Uzbek and Kyg. We underestimated the distance and road quality. Surprised? We spent two full days driving 15mph on severly rutted dirt roads the locals in Maquat said were "unpassible". Ha! Team Best Intentions and the Micra proved them wrong, but we are very road weary. I've never driven on roads this challenging for so long. Guess that's why I have a few dozen grey hairs in my beard.
Yesterday we drove over 700 miles to make up time and stay on schedule. This doesn't even include all the corrupt police stops in the Ukraine and Russia. I'll have to elaborate on that later, but it's safe to say we've been able to hold our own and give a minimum amount of "presents" to the local police. They do things differenly over this way.
On a sad note, Bryan is leaving the Rally in the morning to fly home. Work duties call him back and we wish him well.
Justin and I press on toward Mongolia in the morning. He'll try to update again in the morning time permitting.
Sorry to keep you all in the dark for the past week, but there's zero internet in the desert. I wish I could write more now, but I need to sleep this afternoon and get ready for tomorrow's drive.
One last note: The Kazakh people are amazing. Friendly, helpful and curious. I've taken lots of pictures, but probably won't upload them until I get back.
Yesterday we drove over 700 miles to make up time and stay on schedule. This doesn't even include all the corrupt police stops in the Ukraine and Russia. I'll have to elaborate on that later, but it's safe to say we've been able to hold our own and give a minimum amount of "presents" to the local police. They do things differenly over this way.
On a sad note, Bryan is leaving the Rally in the morning to fly home. Work duties call him back and we wish him well.
Justin and I press on toward Mongolia in the morning. He'll try to update again in the morning time permitting.
Sorry to keep you all in the dark for the past week, but there's zero internet in the desert. I wish I could write more now, but I need to sleep this afternoon and get ready for tomorrow's drive.
One last note: The Kazakh people are amazing. Friendly, helpful and curious. I've taken lots of pictures, but probably won't upload them until I get back.
Thursday, July 24, 2008
in Kiev
We drove straight through Budapest to Kiev, after picking up the paperwork that Nick left us at a hotel about 45 mins from the Ukraine border.
We sat down, had some espresso, and forged documents.
Over the past 24 hours we've been cooped up in the car and are literally destroyed, and need to sleep, eat, and then sleep again.
The confidence is high, but so is the tension, after driving around the capital for hours upon hours in search of tires, Nissan dealer, internet cafes, and a place to crash.
Tonight we recharge and head out again...towards Russia and Kazahkstan directly, as we planned from the beginning.
We sat down, had some espresso, and forged documents.
Over the past 24 hours we've been cooped up in the car and are literally destroyed, and need to sleep, eat, and then sleep again.
The confidence is high, but so is the tension, after driving around the capital for hours upon hours in search of tires, Nissan dealer, internet cafes, and a place to crash.
Tonight we recharge and head out again...towards Russia and Kazahkstan directly, as we planned from the beginning.
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
A new direction.
I suppose things aren't supposed to go as planned when you're having an adventure. Yesterday, Nick called from the Ukraine border. They were turned away due to a problem with their car title. The kicker is that they have our car title.
So, the new plan is to leave Budapest and catch up with them today near Poland and travel together to the Russian border through Latvia.
Since the Micra title is in Nick's name, we will need to cross the Russian border with them and hopefully not have anymore problems.
This could mean that we can't get to the other countries we planned to visit, but at least we'd be in Russia and have path to Mongolia.
We'll be leaving here within the hour and will update if we can when we stop for the night.
So, the new plan is to leave Budapest and catch up with them today near Poland and travel together to the Russian border through Latvia.
Since the Micra title is in Nick's name, we will need to cross the Russian border with them and hopefully not have anymore problems.
This could mean that we can't get to the other countries we planned to visit, but at least we'd be in Russia and have path to Mongolia.
We'll be leaving here within the hour and will update if we can when we stop for the night.
Budapest, Hungary
We made it to Budapest last night at 9pm local time. Bryan and I met Justin's friend Craig who hooked us up with an amazing apartment for two nights. It's in the center of Budapest near the markets and close to the Danube river bridge.
After unloading our bags, we had dinner at a medieval "style" restaurant with Craig and his girlfriend Kati. We drank a cup of mead and ate large portions of meat and potatoes. Afterwards, we came back to the apartment and met team "Do You Do Airports". Nick, Mark and Edward stayed with us at the apartment. Nick was the chap who picked up and stored our Micra for 4 months leading up to the rally. They are a great group of guys and we stayed up too late trying to top each other's stories. They left for Kiev this morning and we hope to meet them in Alamaty, Kazakhstan later in the rally.
Today we walked around Budapest a bit and had a terrific lunch at "Kek Rozsa" or Blue Rose. It's a Jewish-Hungarian restaurant and I had the best Goulash, ever. We're taking pictures of every meal and will be posting stuff on flickr later today if we can use Craig's SD card reader.
We're back at the apartment now resting up for the drive to Kiev tomorrow.
Justin promises to post again later tonight and provide more amusing stories and anecdotes. Hopefully my factual entries aren't too boring. It's all I can manage on no sleep.
We are having a great time and will enjoy our beds tonight. They may be the last we'll see for awhile.
After unloading our bags, we had dinner at a medieval "style" restaurant with Craig and his girlfriend Kati. We drank a cup of mead and ate large portions of meat and potatoes. Afterwards, we came back to the apartment and met team "Do You Do Airports". Nick, Mark and Edward stayed with us at the apartment. Nick was the chap who picked up and stored our Micra for 4 months leading up to the rally. They are a great group of guys and we stayed up too late trying to top each other's stories. They left for Kiev this morning and we hope to meet them in Alamaty, Kazakhstan later in the rally.
Today we walked around Budapest a bit and had a terrific lunch at "Kek Rozsa" or Blue Rose. It's a Jewish-Hungarian restaurant and I had the best Goulash, ever. We're taking pictures of every meal and will be posting stuff on flickr later today if we can use Craig's SD card reader.
We're back at the apartment now resting up for the drive to Kiev tomorrow.
Justin promises to post again later tonight and provide more amusing stories and anecdotes. Hopefully my factual entries aren't too boring. It's all I can manage on no sleep.
We are having a great time and will enjoy our beds tonight. They may be the last we'll see for awhile.
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